A short note on referrals

Kind, polite and hopeful stranger, you asked if I could refer you to a role at my company. Perhaps you sent me a résumé, or a line about ambition or interest. Sometimes just a link and a request.

And it makes sense. We all know how the system works. Referrals open doors. In a world of algorithmic filters and inbox pileups, a human nudge can make all the difference.

I also know things are hard right now. It’s so bloody hard to get that first interview call — to break through the noise, to find someone who’ll give you a fair shot. I’ve been on both sides of this, and I don’t take any of it lightly.

But here’s where I slow down. For me, referring someone is more than just forwarding a résumé or clicking a button. It’s vouching for their craft, their character, the way they might show up to a team.

And I can’t do that lightly.

I know this might sound precious to some. Maybe even self-important. But in my little corner of the world, I try to keep certain things sacred. Trust is one of them. When I refer someone, I’m putting my name on the line — with colleagues I respect, with a system I want to be honest in. That only works if I’ve had the chance to work with someone directly, or know them well enough to speak about how they work, not just what they say.

So if you’ve reached out to me and I haven’t said yes, please know this: it’s not judgment. It’s not gatekeeping. It’s just a boundary I try to hold with care. It helps me stay honest. And in a small way, I hope it helps the system stay honest too.

That said, I’d still love to help in other ways — I can review your résumé, answer questions about the role or the company, or even just be a sounding board. If mentoring would help, I’m happy to offer that too, time and energy permitting.

We’re all walking our own winding paths. If we cross again, and work together, maybe one day I can vouch for you — and will, with pride. Or you, me!

Until then, thanks for understanding, and all the best in your quest to make your dreams come true!